Am I willing to carry this pain for Him? Am I willing to lay my dreams aside for Him? Am I willing to suffer loneliness for Him? Am I willing to face this frightful circumstance for Him?
When there is nothing we can do to alter our circumstances to alleviate the dreaded fear, the loneliness, the physical pain or mental suffering, then we must know we have been cast in the right part on the stage of this drama of life. The Master has chosen a rockier and more exclusive path for me. He has selected the anguish that will wrench my heart and wring it dry of the self-preserving and self-exalting tendencies that fill my breast.
In my own strength, I would run head long for the field of daisies and buttercups and bask in the sunshiny feelings of my well-planned life full of love, acceptance, admiration, and ease. With a tender, fatherly hand, the One Who knows my beginning and my end stays my wandering, thoughtless steps and bids me sit in the quiet place.
Here the clouds obstruct my view of the sun. Here I sit and watch the others tripping along to the fields, laughing and embracing as they go. The pangs of longing, panicked feelings of missing out, of utter despondency overwhelm my thoughts. Why must I stay? I know to struggle against Your hand would be wrong and outwardly my body is still, but inwardly my heart beats a slow and wounded song. If only I could see as You do. If only I could understand the Master plan.
Such a brief performance have we on this stage. We forget we are not the lead performer. We forget this drama revolves not around our three-score and ten. The play has not been written for us, we have been written into the play. It is for Him. He has chosen your life to appear at such a time as this. His love has given you your place and its particular scenes. He gives you His life, His love and His merciful requirements: Will you do this for Him? The cast of characters is set. The lighting and costumes appropriate. The lines your own. May our feeble cry of trust be heard to the rafters:
While I live will I praise the LORD: I will sing praises unto my God while I have any being.
‘Ere the silver cord be broken and the lights darken on this scene called my life, I will fix my eyes on the God who has cast me upon this stage and seek His pleasure and not my own. He is well acquainted with the anguish of my lonely soul, and here He sits with me to help me endure until the times of trial be past.
For Him. I am called to suffer for Him. Some are called to give up their life in martyrdom for Him; some are called to give up their life dream. I can do this when I offer this, my broken heart, as a sacrifice worthy unto Him. He understands the cost of my broken box, and such a sacrifice is well pleasing unto our gracious and most benevolent God.
As seasons of life change, Elizabeth happily remains desperately dependent upon her God. Two of her four children have now branched off to begin their own families. She is a homeschooling veteran and a faithful wife of almost 30 years.